View Full Version : Using Ex's for Motivation
stags
11-09-2010, 10:45 AM
Who else on here does? I was with my ex for just over 2 years at the end of high school and into college, we had a great relationship and I wouldn't go back and change it. It ended in a ****ty way (she cheated on me and it went down hill from there) but there was one other thing that always bothered me. Early on in the relationship a guy friend sent her a picture with his shirt off flexing, he had a six pack but other than that it didn't look like he'd ever touched a weight. She saved the picture and I heard her tell friends how great of a body she thought he had. She never told me this, and I wasn't in bad shape at the time. Ever since we ended the relationship that has stuck with me, and when I need that extra little motivation I think of that. I'm planning to send her a nice picture next year at the end of my cut to show her what she's missing and thank her for motivating me. Is that a dick move?
ShaucoMauco
11-09-2010, 10:48 AM
Who else on here does? I was with my ex for just over 2 years at the end of high school and into college, we had a great relationship and I wouldn't go back and change it. It ended in a ****ty way (she cheated on me and it went down hill from there) but there was one other thing that always bothered me. Early on in the relationship a guy friend sent her a picture with his shirt off flexing, he had a six pack but other than that it didn't look like he'd ever touched a weight. She saved the picture and I heard her tell friends how great of a body she thought he had. She never told me this, and I wasn't in bad shape at the time. Ever since we ended the relationship that has stuck with me, and when I need that extra little motivation I think of that. I'm planning to send her a nice picture next year at the end of my cut to show her what she's missing and thank her for motivating me. Is that a dick move?
chances are that you wont care about her by that time to send a pic.
stags
11-09-2010, 10:53 AM
chances are that you wont care about her by that time to send a pic.
We've been ex's for over a year now, I don't miss her, care for her, love her or anything. She is simply a past learning experience that helps motivate me for the future. Sending her the picture is mainly getting back at her for being shallow in our relationship.
nofame
11-09-2010, 11:16 AM
ahaha. i dig the idea...buttttt, isn't it being shallow also by sending it to her?
SideFX
11-09-2010, 11:26 AM
We've been ex's for over a year now, I don't miss her, care for her, love her or anything. She is simply a past learning experience that helps motivate me for the future. Sending her the picture is mainly getting back at her for being shallow in our relationship.
Sending her the picture is just as shallow, especially if you do it as outright and non-chalantly as you plan to. Putting a picture up on your facebook with the intention of her seeing it is one thing... but sending it to her directly and saying "HAHA LOOK HOW HOT I AM NOW, JAKES ON YOU B|TCH!!" just reeks of desperation and narcissism.
boogie102786
11-09-2010, 11:45 AM
lol Kinda like OP, I don't miss my ex or anything, but I'd love to run into her now just to see the look on her face.
stags
11-09-2010, 11:48 AM
Yeah I guess I'd basically be stooping down to her level and I'm better than that, thanks for the input guys!
Machine61
11-09-2010, 01:13 PM
We've been ex's for over a year now, I don't miss her, care for her, love her or anything. She is simply a past learning experience that helps motivate me for the future. Sending her the picture is mainly getting back at her for being shallow in our relationship.
make it your facebook profile pic; I guarantee your ex's/ friends will comment if you look really f*cking good.
ven33
11-09-2010, 01:30 PM
What happens after you reach this? You will lose your motivation. EX's are not good motivation because sooner or later you won't give a sh*t about them. Then you lose your motivation.
FunAndSun
11-09-2010, 01:45 PM
I think its a good short term motivation.
Just like the other poster said though, I think you'll quickly reach a point where you don't care about showing them anything, and don't care about them at all [negatively or positively.]
I know I've hit the gym hard for weeks after break ups lol. I eventually just return to doing it for myself, and not caring.
There's also the fact that 90% of my exes are fat and out of shape, or in horrible relationships. I don't care, but it is kind of funny I suppose.
Stee22
11-09-2010, 01:56 PM
We've been ex's for over a year now, I don't miss her, care for her, love her or anything. She is simply a past learning experience that helps motivate me for the future. Sending her the picture is mainly getting back at her for being shallow in our relationship.
Chances are she doesn't give a ****.
"getting back at her for being shallow in our relationship"
-If you play a woman's game, I guarantee you'll lose. Girls feed off of drama, Its a fact.
Good luck with it though if you follow through.
Yeah...just don't do it. It's a shallow thing to do, you know you're better than that. Yeah she hurt you..so what. F*** her, people are idiots sometimes (a lot of the time).
It's not about how hard you can hit, it's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward.
DanMcC
11-09-2010, 08:11 PM
I dated this girl for 10 months before I started lifting and we ate out all the time. I could tell I gained weight but i could tell that she really had gained more. Which was one of the reasons upon many I broke it off; yeah I'm shallow. Anyways, one week later I started lifting. I wouldn't send her a picture of the big difference but last time she saw me she complimented on how different/great I looked. She was my first motivation, but long forgotten.
MastaChris
11-09-2010, 08:23 PM
OP when my ex-girlfriend dumped me I wanted to dump all of her **** that she gave me in the hallway. I was going to do it, but then I realized that she wouldn't have given a fuk and I would look like an idiot in doing so.
Don't be a child over a **** relationship. It's over, you've benefited from it more than she has, and you're no longer with someone who is a filthy sluut. It isn't shallow like most people are saying, but it is immature.
Besides, everyone knows to get an ex jealous you have to have her see you treating another girl like you used to treat her.
JMath
11-09-2010, 08:52 PM
OP when my ex-girlfriend dumped me I wanted to dump all of her **** that she gave me in the hallway. I was going to do it, but then I realized that she wouldn't have given a fuk and I would look like an idiot in doing so.
Don't be a child over a **** relationship. It's over, you've benefited from it more than she has, and you're no longer with someone who is a filthy sluut. It isn't shallow like most people are saying, but it is immature.
Besides, everyone knows to get an ex jealous you have to have her see you treating another girl like you used to treat her.
This is pretty much right. You will look like a douche. Two years after you break up you send her a pic? She's going to tell everyone and they'll think you're immature. If you want to REALLY get back at her, LIVE AN AMAZING, HAPPY, SUCCESSFUL LIFE. When she runs into you and you're living large, she's going to wish she was with you.
If you insist on showing off your newly aqcuired body to her, make it happen in person. Example- If she goes to a beach a lot, you go too. Make it seem like a coincedence. She'll see your body and know what she's missing out on. You won't come across as an immature fool that hasn't gotten over her (I know you say you are, but sending texts to make her feel bad shows otherwise). In that situation, it also benefits you because when she tries talking to you, you can show her that you're over her and she doesn't have a chance. As opposed to you sending a picture, she's just going to think "Oh, I'm on his mind".
selffirst
11-09-2010, 11:51 PM
Dude...You wanting to send her a photo of yourself shows me your still into her....If she doesn't respond are you gonna be more pissed and depressed???? I too had a similar experience....My ex didn't cheat on me...she was taking me for granted cause I was 50+ pounds heavier than I am now...One night after a verbal fight....I got pissed at myself....letting myself go....That started my journey...Presently I'm in the best shape of my life....Brah your getting in shape and healthy for yourself...not her....She cheated on you remember???? Move forward...don't dwell on the past...The past is gone..it's left behind for a reason....Focus on you....Much luck.....Self
weightlifter9000
11-10-2010, 12:51 AM
She won't be jealous that you're in shape. But get your ass into shape, and go find a better woman. Fit women are also into fit men. In the end, you will be the winner.
Verbalcody
11-10-2010, 07:06 AM
that's why I got started but im giving it to much better looking girls now