Are once-happy boomers behind rise in midlife suicide?

[bird72]

Are once-happy boomers behind rise in midlife suicide?

In the last 11 years, as more baby boomers entered midlife, the suicide rates in this age group have increased, according to an analysis in the September-October issue of the journal Public Health Reports.

The assumption was that "middle age was the most stable time of your life because you're married, you're settled, you had a job. Suicide rates are stable because their lives are stable," said Dr. Paula Clayton, the medical director for the American Foundation for the Prevention of Suicide.

But this assumption may be shifting.

Lopez and Sklar married in 2004 after a six-year relationship.


David Sklar enjoyed fishing and spending time outdoors wth his family.After she had a difficult day at work, he'd draw baths for her. He prepared breakfasts in bed and cut fresh roses from the garden.

"He was just really sweet like that," she said. "He was always interested in what I liked -- he would listen to me."

Sometimes, the act of bending down to pick up an item left him bedridden. He took Demerol, a pain medication.

"He suffered with depression all of his teen and adult life," Lopez said. "I know the back injury made it worse. He felt like he wasn't a real man -- that he couldn't support his family. That was an issue for him."

Sklar tried to make the best of it, Lopez said, starting a home laptop repair business.

In the mid-2000s, Lopez noticed a change. Sklar became sullen and withdrawn. He no longer played with his son, cooked, fished or ventured outside. When the sun rose, Sklar retreated to the garage where he kept his computer. He played a game all day, rarely getting up to eat or to acknowledge his family.

"He was checking out from life, holing up in the garage and in his world out there," she said.

He refused to get counseling and told Lopez, " 'I'm not disabled in the game. I don't have problems in the game. I can be a whole person.' "
http://edition.cnn.com/2010/HEALTH/10/04/baby.boomer.suicides/index.html?hpt=C2




All in one way or another we have our problems, I had my problems and thank God I was able to recover. But one thing that helped me was to train. Definitely the diet and lifestyle plays an important role in recover from this, also cultivate the spiritual life.

[cozener]

Peoples' lives are being turned upside down by the economy. People that had good jobs/careers that they thought they'd have throughout their lives are finding themselves unemployed and unable to find work. Their "stable" lives are no longer stable. These middle aged people were raised with high expectations for the future and they've had the rug pulled out from under them. I could see this contributing to suicide rates.

[bird72]

Peoples' lives on being turned upside down by the economy. People that had good jobs/careers that they thought they'd have throughout their lives are finding themselves unemployed and unable to find my work. Their "stable" lives are no longer stable. These middle aged people were raised with high expectations for the future and they've had the rug pulled out from under them. I could see this contributing to suicide rates.

I can't imagine those that lost their house and jobs, and even their retirement funds. That's why I rather prefer invest in tangible goods rather than equity securities.

[IronCharles]

While I do empathize with the friends and family of those affected, I don't have much sympathy for those who choose to wallow in self pity. People need to accept responsibility for their lives, rather than blaming others, or blaming circumstances for their less than optimal lot in life.

This site is filled with stories of people who have overcome great obstacles. People previously bedridden with back pain have become champion bodybuilders. Ex-convicts, homeless people, war vets, cancer survivors, and many others who have lived less than tranquil lives have achieved great things, or at least maximized the quality of the lives they have.

OP, it's good that you've found strength in training. Everyone who is down, or feels hopeless needs to realize that the power to improve your lives resides within you. Take charge of your future, and make the life for yourself that will bring you happiness.

[GreenWave1]

While I do empathize with the friends and family of those affected, I don't have much sympathy for those who choose to wallow in self pity. People need to accept responsibility for their lives, rather than blaming others, or blaming circumstances for their less than optimal lot in life.

This site is filled with stories of people who have overcome great obstacles. People previously bedridden with back pain have become champion bodybuilders. Ex-convicts, homeless people, war vets, cancer survivors, and many others who have lived less than tranquil lives have achieved great things, or at least maximized the quality of the lives they have.

OP, it's good that you've found strength in training. Everyone who is down, or feels hopeless needs to realize that the power to improve your lives resides within you. Take charge of your future, and make the life for yourself that will bring you happiness.

I understand what you are trying to say Charles, but for many it is not simply a choice. I'm one of the lucky ones. I've overcome PTSD, depression and addiction through faith in God and the blessing of the bodybuilding lifestyle. However, my siblings, who suffer some of the same issues, are still 'stuck'. It's not that they wallow in self pity so much (although there is a good bit of that), as they seem to be stuck. I don't know how else to put it.

A good friend of mine who battles his own demons observed that "Action is the enemy of depression." I've never heard it put better. Unfortunately, the opposite is also true. Depression is the enemy of action. The clinically depressed find it very difficult to take action. It's just part of the package. Those that do, often find a way out. Most don't.

I wish there was an easy answer to this, but there isn't. If it were easy, we would all eat right, workout, be centered spiritually, and completely able to stand on our own. A quick look around confirms that humanity is not even close to this.

[Minotaur]

People need to accept responsibility for their lives, rather than blaming others, or blaming circumstances for their less than optimal lot in life. ...

Everyone who is down, or feels hopeless needs to realize that the power to improve your lives resides within you. Take charge of your future, and make the life for yourself that will bring you happiness.

That's true to an extent, but keep in mind that there are circumstances beyond one's control. Ageism in hiring does exist. You can't force a company to hire you.

If a 55 or 60 year old mid-level manager is making over $100,000 a year and companies are cutting those positions, where is he or she going to go? The companies put younger cheaper employees in those positions and don't realize they're hoist on their own petard doing that.

So we flip hamburgers at Mickey D's? OK, it's honest work, but the person still probably won't be hired because the manager at Mickey D's knows that if and when a better job comes along, the time and training on the new employee was wasted.

For me, if I lost my job the last thing I would do is try to find another job in IT. This field sucks a fat one, as does corporate in general. Btw, my boss feels the same way. I'd head to the county DPW and apply for work at the reclamation center; I'd head to the township DPW and apply for a spot on a garbage route. But they're not even hiring! :rolleyes:

[eomrat]

While I do empathize with the friends and family of those affected, I don't have much sympathy for those who choose to wallow in self pity. People need to accept responsibility for their lives, rather than blaming others, or blaming circumstances for their less than optimal lot in life.

This site is filled with stories of people who have overcome great obstacles. People previously bedridden with back pain have become champion bodybuilders. Ex-convicts, homeless people, war vets, cancer survivors, and many others who have lived less than tranquil lives have achieved great things, or at least maximized the quality of the lives they have.

OP, it's good that you've found strength in training. Everyone who is down, or feels hopeless needs to realize that the power to improve your lives resides within you. Take charge of your future, and make the life for yourself that will bring you happiness.


Exactly correct.

[Minotaur]

A good friend of mine who battles his own demons observed that "Action is the enemy of depression." I've never heard it put better. Unfortunately, the opposite is also true. Depression is the enemy of action. The clinically depressed find it very difficult to take action. It's just part of the package. Those that do, often find a way out. Most don't.

Clinical depression and situational depression are two different beasts. Though either can lead to suicide.

Situational depression is the one that short term meds are usually prescribed for (and that people wail "I don't need no steenkin' drugs"). Situational depression is the loss of a job or house or pay cut, or illness. The meds help you get through it in the short term, enough to get you out of the funk and take action.

Clinical depression is the more severe and is usually chronic, requiring long term treatment. It's usually because of brain chemical imbalances, not something that happens in life.

[bird72]

While I do empathize with the friends and family of those affected, I don't have much sympathy for those who choose to wallow in self pity. People need to accept responsibility for their lives, rather than blaming others, or blaming circumstances for their less than optimal lot in life.

Agree and disagree, all depends of the circumstance but in some way as you say, I always say to me, if some one do it, I can do it also. Is not so easy to deal with depression without seeing this in a holistic manner. The guy of the article get disable, so he don't put himself in that situation.

This is from a friend of mine...



On a recent radio program, the hosts spoke with a “crisis management” expert about how a celebrity can recover from a public relations disaster. This specialist said one of the keys was to build strong allies who can help the star rehabilitate his or her image. In other words, it is vital when in trouble to get the right help.

That is wise counsel, for at the heart of all crisis management is recognizing that we can’t accomplish everything on our own. Some challenges are too big. Some mountains are too high. In our own seasons of crisis, it is critical that we have help. That’s why it’s comforting to know that we have the strongest ally possible.

In the moment of more difficult the strongest ally for me were God.


Clinical depression and situational depression are two different beasts. Though either can lead to suicide.

Situational depression is the one that short term meds are usually prescribed for (and that people wail "I don't need no steenkin' drugs"). Situational depression is the loss of a job or house or pay cut, or illness. The meds help you get through it in the short term, enough to get you out of the funk and take action.

Clinical depression is the more severe and is usually chronic, requiring long term treatment. It's usually because of brain chemical imbalances, not something that happens in life.

Exactly.

[bird72]

I understand what you are trying to say Charles, but for many it is not simply a choice. I'm one of the lucky ones. I've overcome PTSD, depression and addiction through faith in God and the blessing of the bodybuilding lifestyle. However, my siblings, who suffer some of the same issues, are still 'stuck'. It's not that they wallow in self pity so much (although there is a good bit of that), as they seem to be stuck. I don't know how else to put it.

A good friend of mine who battles his own demons observed that "Action is the enemy of depression." I've never heard it put better. Unfortunately, the opposite is also true. Depression is the enemy of action. The clinically depressed find it very difficult to take action. It's just part of the package. Those that do, often find a way out. Most don't.

I wish there was an easy answer to this, but there isn't. If it were easy, we would all eat right, workout, be centered spiritually, and completely able to stand on our own. A quick look around confirms that humanity is not even close to this.

Amen brother:)

[candyismycarb]

yea not nice to criticize or judge depressed people I am a realtor and went two years without a paycheck recently and my other skills are related to restaurant business and here in my town restaurants were closing like crazy or not hiring at all
there have been times the most money I made was as a musician and that is sad
usually musicians are the brokest people considering their training and school
I guess what I am saying Charles is why don't you go two years without a job or a paycheck and see how you feel

[IronCharles]

Ok, let's see if I'm understanding this. My position is that the suicidal person needs to find ways to improve the quality of his life, and take control of his own situation. But what I'm hearing from some of you is, "it's not that easy", "there are circumstances", "some people's situation is such...". So you're saying it's ok for people with 'special circumstances' to kill themselves? :confused:


Now, understand that I do support laws such as Oregon's Death With Dignity act, wherein people who are diagnosed with terminal diseases can elect to have a doctor assist them to die with a minimum of suffering. However, I don't see any circumstance where the non-terminally ill shoud need to take their own life. Kevin, you said that some people aren't able to think or act normally, and yet the very act of suicide requires planning, and a lot of resolve and determination. If a person can act in such a powerful manner to cause their own death, then why can't they channel that energy into making something positive out of their lives?

[IronCharles]

yea not nice to criticize or judge depressed people I am a realtor and went two years without a paycheck recently and my other skills are related to restaurant business and here in my town restaurants were closing like crazy or not hiring at all
there have been times the most money I made was as a musician and that is sad
usually musicians are the brokest people considering their training and school
I guess what I am saying Charles is why don't you go two years without a job or a paycheck and see how you feel

Nice of you to assume I've lived a charmed life, ma'am. The reality is that you may have not been able to survive some of the things I've been through in my life. However, that would be presumptuous of me, and I'll not make that assumption of you.

[candyismycarb]

Ok, let's see if I'm understanding this. My position is that the suicidal person needs to find ways to improve the quality of his life, and take control of his own situation. But what I'm hearing from some of you is, "it's not that easy", "there are circumstances", "some people's situation is such...". So you're saying it's ok for people with 'special circumstances' to kill themselves? :confused:


Now, understand that I do support laws such as Oregon's Death With Dignity act, wherein people who are diagnosed with terminal diseases can elect to have a doctor assist them to die with a minimum of suffering. However, I don't see any circumstance where the non-terminally ill shoud need to take their own life. Kevin, you said that some people aren't able to think or act normally, and yet the very act of suicide requires planning, and a lot of resolve and determination. If a person can act in such a powerful manner to cause their own death, then why can't they channel that energy into making something positive out of their lives?

this is why you are wrong and the suicide stats prove you are wrong-the ability to overcome great stress is related to one's hope-which is a mental picture of everything working out-faith in things being ok at some point-it is a spiritual issue and some people because of the way they are raised are spiritually weak--they have no confidence in themselves or their future because of too many bad experiences or abuse--I used to work in my church so I saw this alot---people hitting low points =some got better fast some are stuck and have been for decades==it is aggrivating because everyone around them can see potential but if they cannot "see" it then it's not there for them to enter into

[Minotaur]

Ok, let's see if I'm understanding this. My position is that the suicidal person needs to find ways to improve the quality of his life, and take control of his own situation. But what I'm hearing from some of you is, "it's not that easy", "there are circumstances", "some people's situation is such...". So you're saying it's ok for people with 'special circumstances' to kill themselves? :confused:

I can't and won't speak for anyone else, but what I am saying is that unless you've experienced the despair and despondency of losing your job, house, and possibly losing your family because they left you, you can't understand what drives a person to do what they do. No amount of verses of Kumbaya is going to cheer the person up; neither is a novena or any amount of prayers. "Planet Earth & the USA in 2010: Welcome".

There are things you just can't control. I said you can't force someone to hire you; you can't force companies to create jobs; you can't stop evictions or foreclosures because you can't make rent or mortgage payments. This is not all "Tiptoe Through The Tulips".

Btw, suicide is the one last thing the person who has lost everything has control over when he or she has no control over any of the other things I mentioned.

[candyismycarb]

Nice of you to assume I've lived a charmed life, ma'am. The reality is that you may have not been able to survive some of the things I've been through in my life. However, that would be presumptuous of me, and I'll not make that assumption of you.

usually when someone goes through a rough time it makes them more compassionate

[Old-Time-Lifter]

Unfortunately, we as a generation have been coddled by and large in ways our parents were not. We grew up in generally prosperous times and most (not all) really haven't suffered. We also thought we'd never grow old we are the "baby boomers" somehow that was supposed to make us special. :(

I'm not surprised by this at all actually for alot of reasons, though I do find it very concerning. :(

[KeepItMoving]

While I do empathize with the friends and family of those affected, I don't have much sympathy for those who choose to wallow in self pity. People need to accept responsibility for their lives, rather than blaming others, or blaming circumstances for their less than optimal lot in life.

This site is filled with stories of people who have overcome great obstacles. People previously bedridden with back pain have become champion bodybuilders. Ex-convicts, homeless people, war vets, cancer survivors, and many others who have lived less than tranquil lives have achieved great things, or at least maximized the quality of the lives they have.

OP, it's good that you've found strength in training. Everyone who is down, or feels hopeless needs to realize that the power to improve your lives resides within you. Take charge of your future, and make the life for yourself that will bring you happiness.



YOU'RE SO INSENSITIVE AND HEARTLESS AND BLACK AND WHITE AND STUPID!!! IT'S NOT THAT EASY!!!

(I hope you realize I'm typing with my tongue in my cheek.)

Great Post!! Cannot rep; must spread first.

You are stating the "end of the day" "after the lights go out" "when all the shouting is over," and "when the dust clears truth." We can seek (and must seek) all the love and support we need, but, after the horses are all accounted for (like that one?) it's our responsibility to handle.

If more of us accepted this plain, sometimes hard, ultimately true reality, our world would be better off....and governments would be a hell of alot smaller.

Iron Charles....I find your words here to be bold, courageous, and inspirational. And, from what I can tell, you are ruggeddly individualistic enough to believe them.

[Brackneyc]

I can't and won't speak for anyone else, but what I am saying is that unless you've experienced the despair and despondency of losing your job, house, and possibly losing your family because they left you, you can't understand what drives a person to do what they do. No amount of verses of Kumbaya is going to cheer the person up; neither is a novena or any amount of prayers. "Planet Earth & the USA in 2010: Welcome".

There are things you just can't control. I said you can't force someone to hire you; you can't force companies to create jobs; you can't stop evictions or foreclosures because you can't make rent or mortgage payments. This is not all "Tiptoe Through The Tulips".

Even with all of the economic downturn and daily horror stories about people losing everything they own, there is someone right now, somehwere, buying something they don't need, and cannot afford. At what point do we say, "Listen, you KNOW things are not going well, what are YOU doing to help yourself, or at least minimize the affects of a sudden change in YOUR life."

The economy (housing being the biggest issue imo) has been crap for the past ten years or so (and longer for some), and shows very little evidence of a significant come back. Yet, people continue to buy sht they don't need, and engage in behaviors which most sesnible folks know will not end well.

I am all about helping folks who are in a tough spot. I do find it increaisngly hard however to feel "sorry" for folks who have seen the writing on the wall, and have "chosen" to ignore it. I'm not going to go into all of my personal history here, but I've not always made the best choices financially. I did however correct myself before it was too late. I'm not special, but I do have eyes and ears. I see what is happening around me. As much as I'd love to buy a bigger house, a nicer car and travel, it isn't in the cards.

Rant off. :)

[candyismycarb]

YOU'RE SO INSENSITIVE AND HEARTLESS AND BLACK AND WHITE AND STUPID!!! IT'S NOT THAT EASY!!!

(I hope you realize I'm typing with my tongue in my cheek.)

Great Post!! Cannot rep; must spread first.

You are stating the "end of the day" "after the lights go out" "when all the shouting is over," and "when the dust clears truth." We can seek (and must seek) all the love and support we need, but, after the horses are all accounted for (like that one?) it's our responsibility to handle.

If more of us accepted this plain, sometimes hard, ultimately true reality, our world would be better off....and governments would be a hell of alot smaller.

Iron Charles....I find your words here to be bold, courageous, and inspirational. And, from what I can tell, you are ruggeddly individualistic enough to believe them.


really?
what about the issue of this


Published on Friday, October 20, 2006 by the lnter Press Service
Millions of Starving Shame the World, U.N. Says
by Thalif Deen

UNITED NATIONS - Since hunger and famine are still widespread in parts of Africa and Asia, the international community is in violation of the right to food as a basic universal human right, according to a new study released by the United Nations.

"Despite promises to eradicate hunger, there has been little progress in reducing the global number of victims of hunger," said Jean Ziegler, the U.N. special rapporteur on the right to food and author of the report.

More than 852 million people -- about 13 percent of the world population -- do not have enough food each day to sustain a healthy life, according to the Rome-based Food and Agriculture organization (FAO).

[candyismycarb]

YOU'RE SO INSENSITIVE AND HEARTLESS AND BLACK AND WHITE AND STUPID!!! IT'S NOT THAT EASY!!!

(I hope you realize I'm typing with my tongue in my cheek.)

Great Post!! Cannot rep; must spread first.

You are stating the "end of the day" "after the lights go out" "when all the shouting is over," and "when the dust clears truth." We can seek (and must seek) all the love and support we need, but, after the horses are all accounted for (like that one?) it's our responsibility to handle.

If more of us accepted this plain, sometimes hard, ultimately true reality, our world would be better off....and governments would be a hell of alot smaller.

Iron Charles....I find your words here to be bold, courageous, and inspirational. And, from what I can tell, you are ruggeddly individualistic enough to believe them.



what about child slavery?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/4038249/

[Minotaur]

Even with all of the economic downturn and daily horror stories about people losing everything they own, there is someone right now, somehwere, buying something they don't need, and cannot afford. At what point do we say, "Listen, you KNOW things are not going well, what are YOU doing to help yourself, or at least minimize the affects of a sudden change in YOUR life."

The economy (housing being the biggest issue imo) has been crap for the past ten years or so (and longer for some), and shows very little evidence of a significant come back. Yet, people continue to buy sht they don't need, and engage in behaviors which most sesnible folks know will not end well.

There's no question people have lived beyond their means; I don't deny or excuse that. But that's not what I'm addressing. I'm addressing the the situation of the poor schlub who through no fault of his own has been laid off, and whose unemployment insurance ran out two months ago, after its six months limit. Now he has no health insurance because he can't afford COBRA.

Let's not start painting everyone the same color with the same brush, as this group is wont to do because is everyone (here) is comfy cozy and has it all figured out.

[IronCharles]

I can't and won't speak for anyone else, but what I am saying is that unless you've experienced the despair and despondency of losing your job, house, and possibly losing your family because they left you, you can't understand what drives a person to do what they do. No amount of verses of Kumbaya is going to cheer the person up; neither is a novena or any amount of prayers. "Planet Earth & the USA in 2010: Welcome".

There are things you just can't control. I said you can't force someone to hire you; you can't force companies to create jobs; you can't stop evictions or foreclosures because you can't make rent or mortgage payments. This is not all "Tiptoe Through The Tulips".

Btw, suicide is the one last thing the person who has lost everything has control over when he or she has no control over any of the other things I mentioned.
Frank, I've lost all those things, and much, much more. Yet at no point did I feel that I would be better off dead. I'm not special -- we all have that power within ourselves. Life is too precious, and possibilities are endless. Every person can in some way make things better for themselves. But, the best we can do is to try and help people realize that. Ultimately, they will have to decide their own fate.

[Minotaur]

Ultimately, they will have to decide their own fate.

And there you have it.

Here's a real tragedy: Jonathan Brandis (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jonathan_Brandis#Death)

[candyismycarb]

Frank, I've lost all those things, and much, much more. Yet at no point did I feel that I would be better off dead. I'm not special -- we all have that power within ourselves. Life is too precious, and possibilities are endless. Every person can in some way make things better for themselves. But, the best we can do is to try and help people realize that. Ultimately, they will have to decide their own fate.

yea but doesn't the fact that THIS
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_suicide_rate

exists prove you are wrong to say "everyone" has "the power"

[OutOfStep]

More than 852 million people -- about 13 percent of the world population -- do not have enough food each day to sustain a healthy life, according to the Rome-based Food and Agriculture organization (FAO).


I'll bet it hasn't stopped those people from breeding like rats though.

[GreenWave1]

Ok, let's see if I'm understanding this. My position is that the suicidal person needs to find ways to improve the quality of his life, and take control of his own situation. But what I'm hearing from some of you is, "it's not that easy", "there are circumstances", "some people's situation is such...". So you're saying it's ok for people with 'special circumstances' to kill themselves? :confused:


Now, understand that I do support laws such as Oregon's Death With Dignity act, wherein people who are diagnosed with terminal diseases can elect to have a doctor assist them to die with a minimum of suffering. However, I don't see any circumstance where the non-terminally ill shoud need to take their own life. Kevin, you said that some people aren't able to think or act normally, and yet the very act of suicide requires planning, and a lot of resolve and determination. If a person can act in such a powerful manner to cause their own death, then why can't they channel that energy into making something positive out of their lives?

Nobody said that it is okay for people to commit suicide. I agree that it would be great if people could 'take control of his own situation'. Frank nailed it. When someone commits suicide, they often feel that that is the only control they have.

Despair is what it is. If it was easy to deal with, we wouldn't have suicide. It's not, so we do. I consider myself blessed in that, by the grace and strength of God, I pulled myself up from the depths of despair and thoughts of suicide. I am glad that I did and am happier today then I've ever been in my life. But, it was not easy. It took me years of HARD work to get to where I am today. Some people don't have it in them.

Even for me, the work is not done.

I'm off to therapy now (srs).

[Brackneyc]

yea but doesn't the fact that THIS
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_suicide_rate

exists prove you are wrong to say "everyone" has "the power"

I'll assume you are like most folks, and have a bad day, week, or maybe even a bad year. What is/was it that kept you from taking that final drastic step?

[KeepItMoving]

If anyone has a few hours to listen to the obstacles I have overcome in my own life, let me know. Others too have faced and overcome situations more difficult than I have. I have great respect for those folks.

Recently, I got some difficult medical news. I won't elaborate. My initial reaction was self pity. Fear has tried to pry into my head too. I am fighting. It is toughest just before I try to sleep, and when I wake in the middle of the night. Alone. I think about my responsibilities to so many others that I have. Their professional lives depend on me. I think of my family, and how they need me. I think of how much my clients are counting on me. Then, I try to sleep again.

And ya know what? It doesn't change one damn thing about anything. I have people around to support me. I have lived a life that has produced close, loyal loved ones. My actions have caused them to be with me. In the end, it is my matter to deal with. And I will/am dealing with it.

I make the worst victim you'll ever meet.

[candyismycarb]

I'll assume you are like most folks, and have a bad day, week, or maybe even a bad year. What is/was it that kept you from taking that final drastic step?

I know alot of people don't want to hear it but my relationship with God always makes things more than great
I spend about an hour a day in worship/prayer and that produces peace beyond the cares ot the world

also when you pray alot you can end up having dreams about what is up ahead

there have been lots of problems I had that I ended up having a dream of it working out and it did

so over time I have learned to not get too intimidated by problems
God can fix stuff from out of nowhere -fast- and I"ve seen Him do it


also I grew up acheiving alot--times are not easy right now but I have had so much success in the past I just think this is just a phase our country is going through right now and it will pass--

also I have good relationship with my family and friends=-my work going down the tubes made me a better guitar player and even though my bands don';t make tons of money we are good friends and have lots of fun--that helps alot

[tfpriest]

I am a realtor and went two years without a paycheck recentlyl

That's your own fault. There is work and money to be made everywhere if you are ambitious enough to find it.

[candyismycarb]

That's your own fault. There is work and money to be made everywhere if you are ambitious enough to find it.

not really it takes money to make money in RE and if you are broke doesn't work

even Donald Trump went broke once
his friends had to bail him out of billions

if it can happen to D it can happen to anyone
lots of people go broke at times

and I have work now--

[Minotaur]

That's your own fault. There is work and money to be made everywhere if you are ambitious enough to find it.

You're 23.

http://i164.photobucket.com/albums/u12/Minotauros_2007/Theres_The_Door.jpg

[BJplayer]

I have been "clinically depressed" before. It wasnt something I chose. It wasnt something I could just pull myself up by my bootstraps and say, "Oh well, f this sht! I aint going to be depressed anymore". Its like quicksand, the harder you try to escape, the deeper it pulls you down into it. So, for those of you who seem to think that depression is something you have absolutely control over, well you dont. And I wasnt seeking sympathy and didnt share it with anyone, as I didnt want anyone to know. If I had had the right opportunity and been a little further down that path, I could have taken my own life. I am glad I didnt. I am a happy fun loving guy, for most of my life, but just caught up in a web that was very difficult. Now, I am all good!

[IronCharles]

That's your own fault. There is work and money to be made everywhere if you are ambitious enough to find it.
I'm 49 and I absolutely agree with this statement.

Do I have to GTFO too? ;)

[bird72]

So you're saying it's ok for people with 'special circumstances' to kill themselves? :confused:


Nobody say thats, I even don't know where you get thats from people post here.

[Minotaur]

I'm 49 and I absolutely agree with this statement.

Do I have to GTFO too? ;)

At 23 probably the only experience he's had making money is bussing the counter at Bowling Alley Sally's Greasy Spoon Diner. People have had broken bones falling off high horses.

[bird72]

That's your own fault. There is work and money to be made everywhere if you are ambitious enough to find it.


I have been "clinically depressed" before. It wasnt something I chose. It wasnt something I could just pull myself up by my bootstraps and say, "Oh well, f this sht! I aint going to be depressed anymore". Its like quicksand, the harder you try to escape, the deeper it pulls you down into it. So, for those of you who seem to think that depression is something you have absolutely control over, well you dont. And I wasnt seeking sympathy and didnt share it with anyone, as I didnt want anyone to know. If I had had the right opportunity and been a little further down that path, I could have taken my own life. I am glad I didnt. I am a happy fun loving guy, for most of my life, but just caught up in a web that was very difficult. Now, I am all good!

You just pointed out something very true. People who think they can control depression, are just delusional and don't know how is pass throught this, saying that’s, I don’t think sucide is the solution, that’s why I made the thread, because depression have a cure and I pointed out how I overcome it.

[candyismycarb]

I'm 49 and I absolutely agree with this statement.

Do I have to GTFO too? ;)

ok Charles
MR know it all

what if you had to make an appearance as a guest speaker to the prisoners of the Holocost
people starving to death -some suicidal

what would you say

"pull yourselves up by your bootstraps people--you have the power"

sorry but your philosphy is not the answer for everyone

[bird72]

At 23 probably the only experience he's had making money is bussing the counter at Bowling Alley Sally's Greasy Spoon Diner. People have had broken bones falling off high horses.

When you live with your mon and pops you think money is everywhere.

[Minotaur]

When you live with your mon and pops you think money is everywhere.

That's why the ****tards in the development won't go out and shovel snow in the winter either at their own house or elsewhere to make money. They're sitting on their hind ends playing with Xbox, iPud or whatever because Mommy and Daddy give them what they want. So stupid ass Daddy is out there shoveling snow and then walking stooped over (more like stupid over) like he's 90 years old for a week.

[IronCharles]

ok Charles
MR know it all

what if you had to make an appearance as a guest speaker to the prisoners of the Holocost
people starving to death -some suicidal

what would you say

"pull yourselves up by your bootstraps people--you have the power"

sorry but your philosphy is not the answer for everyone

That would be fat preferable to me than your message of "Gee, sorry about your bad luck. Try and have a nice day!". :rolleyes:

[GreenWave1]

That would be fat preferable to me than your message of "Gee, sorry about your bad luck. Try and have a nice day!". :rolleyes:

I understand where you are coming from Charles. When I was younger (20's), I used to think that depression, suicide, and addiction were choices. All you have to do is change your attitude or take control or stop using whatever.

Little did I know what life had in store for me. In my early 30's I received an object lesson that I could have done without.

Now I know better then to be dismissive about these things.

I'm glad that you don't understand what I am talking about. Seriously. Ignorance is bliss.

[Old-Time-Lifter]

I understand where you are coming from Charles. When I was younger (20's), I used to think that depression, suicide, and addiction were choices. All you have to do is change your attitude or take control or stop using whatever.

Little did I know what life had in store for me. In my early 30's I received an object lesson that I could have done without.

Now I know better then to be dismissive about these things.

I'm glad that you don't understand what I am talking about. Seriously. Ignorance is bliss.

qft........

[candyismycarb]

That would be fat preferable to me than your message of "Gee, sorry about your bad luck. Try and have a nice day!". :rolleyes:

absolutely is not my message
in fact my earlier post clearly shows my faith in my God is my answer and it works
for me and many others


you have a habit of making assumptions and reading stuff that is not there
kinda annoying

[Brackneyc]

ok Charles
MR know it all

what if you had to make an appearance as a guest speaker to the prisoners of the Holocost
people starving to death -some suicidal

what would you say

"pull yourselves up by your bootstraps people--you have the power"

sorry but your philosphy is not the answer for everyone


Little extreme don't you think?

How about focusing on folks who absolutle DO have some contol over their situation. Never a good idea to find the most extreme case possible, and then try to apply it to someone who has, for instance, lost their house because they overspent.

[candyismycarb]

Little extreme don't you think?

How about focusing on folks who absolutle DO have some contol over their situation. Never a good idea to find the most extreme case possible, and then try to apply it to someone who has, for instance, lost their house because they overspent.

you're taking the fun out of me harrassing C


I would say the same thing to those people--

[Brackneyc]

you're taking the fun out of me harrassing c


i would say the same thing to those people--

k. :)

[Old-Time-Lifter]

Little extreme don't you think?

How about focusing on folks who absolutle DO have some contol over their situation. Never a good idea to find the most extreme case possible, and then try to apply it to someone who has, for instance, lost their house because they overspent.

Extreme is just her nature. ;)

Unfortunately though even folks that have had what we might think is a minor bump in the road take their own lives. :(

[IronCharles]

absolutely is not my message
in fact my earlier post clearly shows my faith in my God is my answer and it works
for me and many others


you have a habit of making assumptions and reading stuff that is not there
kinda annoying

And what of those not of your faith? Are they doomed to despair and suicide?







(and why didn't God provide you a job for two years? ;) )

[candyismycarb]

And what of those not of your faith? Are they doomed to despair and suicide?

yep
the bible shows us that turning your back on God will lead to destruction here and in the hereafter

[candyismycarb]

And what of those not of your faith? Are they doomed to despair and suicide?







(and why didn't God provide you a job for two years? ;) )


he provided better
four times I got money supernaturally-always when I was at the end of my rope-- and I also got a free car that is good enough for my job

the car I had was in need of so much repair I had to sell it because I did not have enough money to fix it--I went about 4 months with no car then got a Nissan Sentra free

trust me my heavenly father takes very good care of me and I always am gratefull
I feel sorry for people who do not know God this way
he really can solve problems if you let him

[candyismycarb]

in fact those two years taught me alot and I am better for it

[Old-Time-Lifter]

And what of those not of your faith? Are they doomed to despair and suicide?


Of course not. But I do think having God in your life helps to get through this life and certainly helps one get into the next. ;) :D

[BJplayer]

But I do think having God in your life helps to get through this life and certainly helps one get into the next. ;) :D

So does Crown and Coke. Just sayin...

[IronCharles]

It should have dawned upon me that those who most disagree here with my argument of finding strength within one's self are those who have chosen to lean upon God first, and self second, or not at all. Now, understand, I do believe in God, and I do believe He is capable of providing strength when necessary..... however, I also believe that "God helps those who help themselves". God created within us the intelligence to think, and find solutions to our problems. Even those who don't believe are capable of amazing things, when they choose to act, rather than throw themselves upon the ground like helpless children, and pout.

And I'll leave it at that, since I don't want to push the rules against R&P in this section of the forums.

[Corbi]

Clinical depression and situational depression are two different beasts. Though either can lead to suicide.

Situational depression is the one that short term meds are usually prescribed for (and that people wail "I don't need no steenkin' drugs"). Situational depression is the loss of a job or house or pay cut, or illness. The meds help you get through it in the short term, enough to get you out of the funk and take action.



Been there & done that. Last year when I was informed of the need for my surgery there were so many thoughts going thru my head. My Dr gave a prescription for some form of anti-depressant even though I told her it wouldn't be needed as I thought I had a firm grasp on it all. Glad I had those damn pills afterwards though & I knew what was happening and felt powerless to control it without the drugs. When you are getting talks from Drs about your mortality & the very distinct possibility of dying during surgery, it really screws with your mind.

I am quite positive that without the drugs as well as my wife, I would have killed myself at 1 point during the ordeal. I even gave her the keys to the gun cabinet & told her to hide them & not to give them back until everything was back to normal.



If anyone has a few hours to listen to the obstacles I have overcome in my own life, let me know. Others too have faced and overcome situations more difficult than I have. I have great respect for those folks.

Recently, I got some difficult medical news. I won't elaborate. My initial reaction was self pity. Fear has tried to pry into my head too. I am fighting. It is toughest just before I try to sleep, and when I wake in the middle of the night. Alone. I think about my responsibilities to so many others that I have. Their professional lives depend on me. I think of my family, and how they need me. I think of how much my clients are counting on me. Then, I try to sleep again.




Like I wrote, been thru it myself & it sucks big time. Good luck brother.




Unfortunately though even folks that have had what we might think is a minor bump in the road take their own lives. :(

very true, I have had 2 friends kill themselves over very minor crap involving the police. Both of which would have resulted in a max of 6 months in county lockup. 1 shot himself in his car as the cops approached, the other managed to hang himself in his cell. Wish I had the truth/answers as to what the hell they were thinking & why.

[Minotaur]

I am quite positive that without the drugs as well as my wife, I would have killed myself at 1 point during the ordeal. I even gave her the keys to the gun cabinet & told her to hide them & not to give them back until everything was back to normal.

I'm glad you came through it OK and everything is good now. My brother-in-law is bipolar and has a collection of guns. He gave them to my nephew to keep for him. I don't have guns but I have plenty of nylon rope and enough pharmaceutical knowledge of which of my meds in which combos would put a few more $$ in the crematorium's pocket (partner wants to bury me, but I said I'll haunt him if he does... and he knows I can do it :D).

My t-doc and I talk about this regularly. The time that really frightened her and my p-doc was last Easter week. I sat in the mall lost in thought, watching the mothers with their strollers and small children. I wondered when would be a good time, since there was a constant stream of them, to pull a gun out of my pocket (if I had one) and put it to my head and not have a child witness it.

I was in a mixed state, which is a very bad place to be. I suffer from both situational and bipolar depression. Bad combo. The bipolar hypomania episodes are the reason I "go off" sometimes. One of the reasons I disappear occasionally is because of things that trigger me, so I have to step back. Like Sister Mary Discipline and Father Half-Nelson said "avoid the near occasions of sin".

The point of this manic rambling is that I'd give my left testicle if I could turn this **** off. If anyone doesn't believe that we wish we could change this, they are out of their mind, no pun intended.

[tfpriest]

I'm 49 and I absolutely agree with this statement.

Do I have to GTFO too? ;)

Thanks IronCharles.

To everyone else, sorry for posting in your 35+ section. I just saw an interesting topic and thought I'd comment.

I was honestly shocked at the responses though when I came back in this thread this morning.

Not a single one of you, regardless of age, has any right to make ASSumptions about my life experience regardless of age, or anyone elses really. My opinion is as valid as anyone's and it's sort of moronic to stereotype me in any way, shape, or form.

Here's some cliffs:

-Grew up in ****ty impoverished white trash Michigan
-Parents divorced, father dissapears never to be found or pay child support.
-Mom works min wage job to pay for trailer.
-I get morbidly obese as an early teen (330lbs)
-No money. AT ALL. Start college at 17.
-Have only what the government gave me to goto school with and lots of student loans.
-Get more obese and suffer from serious health issues. Get married at 18 to high school sweetheart. Work part time jobs to try and pay for a car, insurance, health bills, ect.
-Bought a cheap as **** house to save on paying ridiculous collegetown rent.
-Cant afford to maintain cheap as **** house.
-Rack up thousands in credit card debt because no health insurance and health problems and car maintenance that I just couldnt keep up on going to school full time and working full time min wage (at the time was 5.75 an hour).
-Fail out of college. Cant keep up on school work, maintain a house, suffer health issues, work 50 hours of week. Was in the music program to become a music teacher, and they wanted me for rehearsels and practices and sectionals and **** round the clock 24/7.
-Still no money.
-Divorced at 20. Anything I had built up, I lost in divorce because ex-wife father paid for lawyer. 75% of the debts went to me even though they were mutual debts.
-House foreclosed.
-Live in car for two months.
-Work in a mentally disabled home cleaning soiled diapers off 50 year olds for 14 hours a day for a year.
-Get apt for low income people.
-File bankruptcy.
-Get in shape. Lose 50 lbs.
-Get enough money to take care of basics. Return to school.
-Start as a temp for a big company at 21 years old doing IT work.
-Company pays for training and school.
-Lose another 70 pounds.
-Get hired full time just before turning 22.
-Turn 24 next month. Hired full time with lots of great benefits. Have had two promotions since, relocated to major city in Kentucky, bought a new car, am debt free, caught up on student loans, and dating an amazing woman in her 30's.

So, it sucks if you sat around and played Pong or Atari in the 70's (or "cruised" the streets or went to disco) into your 20's and did nothing with your life. Anyone can beat the odds if they work hard, are resourceful, or relocate to where they can make it. That's all I'm saying.

Just thought I'd add in this, it wasnt god that made my life turn around. I did not pray. Bills werent going to be paid attending services. It was just a lot of hard work and "making it happen", no "supernatural gifts" either.

[LisaSkinnoble]

-Turn 24 next month. Hired full time. Have had two promotions since, relocated to major city in Kentucky, bought a new car, am debt free, caught up on student loans, and dating an amazing woman in her 30's.



A truly inspiring story. Actually, several inspiring stories all wrapped into one! Talk about overcoming adversity. Congratulations. You, good Sir, have drive and discipline. I would welcome your posts in the O35 section anytime.

Reps to this man.

[Minotaur]

That's your own fault. There is work and money to be made everywhere if you are ambitious enough to find it.


Not a single one of you, regardless of age, has any right to make ASSumptions about my life experience regardless of age, or anyone elses really. My opinion is as valid as anyone's and it's sort of moronic to stereotype me in any way, shape, or form.



I think it was you who made the first assumption directed at candyismycarb without knowing anything about her. Sauce for the goose.

I'm glad you pulled yourself up, and you're to be congratulated. However, not everyone is as fortunate, nor can be painted with such broad brush strokes as you did in your first post. That's and the chances of someone your age making such big progress being almost nil is what earned you the derision. So, I apologize for the age comment. Lesson learned.

[GreenWave1]

...

Anyone can beat the odds if they work hard, are resourceful, or relocate to where they can make it. That's all I'm saying.

Just thought I'd add in this, it wasnt god that made my life turn around. I did not pray. Bills werent going to be paid attending services. It was just a lot of hard work and "making it happen", no "supernatural gifts" either.

Glad to see that you overcame all that. But what does any of that have to do with the topic? You weren't suicidal, that is wonderful. Seriously.

You are just another person who does not understand this at all, yet are happy to say things like "Anyone can beat the odds if they work hard, ..." I was trying to be polite in this thread, but when people keep making comments like this, I scratch my head and wonder what to do. If it were only that easy, then people would not commit suicide.

I also cannot overlook the irony in your post.

You open with this:


Not a single one of you, regardless of age, has any right to make ASSumptions about my life experience regardless of age, or anyone elses really. My opinion is as valid as anyone's and it's sort of moronic to stereotype me in any way, shape, or form.

Then come with this:


So, it sucks if you sat around and played Pong or Atari in the 70's (or "cruised" the streets or went to disco) into your 20's and did nothing with your life.

Funny, because that does not resemble my life at all. I'm an Eagle Scout, put myself throught college and have worked hard my whole life. However, a brutally violent childhood and the murder of my brother resulted in PTSD, depression, addiction and suicidal thoughts.

I am sincerely happy that you and many others do not understand why someone would commit suicide. Truly happy. You are blessed. I wish I did not understand it. The price exacted for this knowledge was more then anyone would willingly pay.

[tfpriest]

I think it was you who made the first assumption directed at candyismycarb without knowing anything about her. Sauce for the goose.


True, I might have jumped the gun on that one. But she said she was a realtor, which means she was probably having slow time because of the slumped economy.

I know if I was realtor, or any profession really, I'd be pursuing some secondary income in the form of a part time job if bills werent getting paid.

[Dw33z1L]

For some, depression is like cancer. You have it, you don't want it, but it's there and it's not going away. I've been clinically depressed for years. My best friend (who was bipolar) committed suicide several years ago...that just about did ME in. My daughter's boyfriend (also bipolar) committed suicide at the tender age of 14...that just about did my daughter in...it also pushed me deeper into depression. Seeing the life in my daughter's eyes just "leave", and not being able to really DO anything about it as her father is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. All I could do was be supportive and ensure that we got her into counseling...which, she is still in to this day, four years later.

I have that "special power" or whatever you want to call it (it ain't God). MY special power, or purpose is my daughter. She's seen too much despair in her short life, and there's no way in hell that I would do something like commit suicide, knowing what it would do to her.

SO, yes...I was able to pull myself up by my bootstraps. It wasn't easy, still isn't easy, but I do it. MANY people don't have that "special power" or purpose. I'm not saying that it's "OK" for them to just off themself...but I sure as hell can understand the pressures that would push them to do just that.

Charles, your words are sharp...as in painful. To an extent, I agree with you. I have no idea the obstacles you've had to overcome in your life, but I'm glad that you found the strength within yourself and in your surroundings to get you to where you are today. Honestly though...some people truly get lost in despair and can find no way out.

[tfpriest]

I am sincerely happy that you and many others do not understand why someone would commit suicide. Truly happy. You are blessed. I wish I did not understand it. The price exacted for this knowledge was more then anyone would willingly pay.

It's actually ironic that you mentioned this. Sorry I derailed the OP's topic

I forgot to put in my cliffnotes that my wife of 18 was depressed. Not just sad, but to the point of being suicidal. I had several 911 calls, she has lots of scars on her wrists from knives and she was always wanting to drive into trees, ect.

After a lot of counseling and different medications, she got better.

My experience is that a deep seeded memory or series of events or chemical imbalance is responsible for most depression. Obviously I'm not an expert of any sort of psychologist..but I think both are fixable if you take the reigns and pursue the channels available for assistance, and are as consistent with them as a good bodybuilder or fitness enthusiast is with their routines and diets.

[Old-Time-Lifter]

Personally I wouldn't still be here if it wasn't for God in my life, so big ups to those of you who aren't believers and have pulled through tough times, but please don't discredit and put down those of us who have experienced the effect of the Savior in our lives.

That is all.........

[candyismycarb]

True, I might have jumped the gun on that one. But she said she was a realtor, which means she was probably having slow time because of the slumped economy.

I know if I was realtor, or any profession really, I'd be pursuing some secondary income in the form of a part time job if bills werent getting paid.

if you had read my post you would know I already said working in restaurants is my other skill along with being a musician

in my town restaurants were closing or very slow /overloaded with applicants-=and some of my musician friends had their slowest year in their life

point is I did try for a long time and I have worked since I was 14 every week of my life-no vacation so after job hunting for a very long time I decided to just wait it out--I did some catering here and there at times

[GreenWave1]

It's actually ironic that you mentioned this. Sorry I derailed the OP's topic

I forgot to put in my cliffnotes that my wife of 18 was depressed. Not just sad, but to the point of being suicidal. I had several 911 calls, she has lots of scars on her wrists from knives and she was always wanting to drive into trees, ect.

After a lot of counseling and different medications, she got better.

My experience is that a deep seeded memory or series of events or chemical imbalance is responsible for most depression. I think both are fixable if you take the reigns and pursue the channels available for assistance.

Witnessing it and experiencing it are not the same thing.

That said, I do agree that it is often fixable. Having someone there that can help you seek out the assistance is invaluable. But even then, some people don't accept the help. Why? I don't know. They just don't.

[GreenWave1]

personally i wouldn't still be here if it wasn't for god in my life, so big ups to those of you who aren't believers and have pulled through tough times, but please don't discredit and put down those of us who have experienced the effect of the savior in our lives.

That is all.........

qft.

[tfpriest]

if you had read my post you would know I already said working in restaurants is my other skill along with being a musician

in my town restaurants were closing or very slow /overloaded with applicants-=and some of my musician friends had their slowest year in their life

point is I did try for a long time and I have worked since I was 14 every week of my life-no vacation so after job hunting for a very long time I decided to just wait it out--I did some catering here and there at times

Yes, I read that you had other skills, which is why I was perplexed you had no leads.

But again, there is always work that needs to be done, even if that means laboring outside your typical profession, if it means paying the bills.

Also, you said, "in my town". A longer commute to another town would have yielded some results I'm sure.

[candyismycarb]

Yes, I read that you had other skills, which is why I was perplexed you had no leads.

But again, there is always work that needs to be done, even if that means laboring outside your typical profession, if it means paying the bills.

Also, you said, "in my town". A longer commute to another town would have yielded some results I'm sure.

um
I Live in the 4th largest city in the nation
commuting four hours to Dallas would not help if they are in an employment slump also

I mean are you serious
do you read the news at all
2007/2008 was a mortgage crisis -I worked for the first or second richest real estate company in my town and the office I was in closed(the main office is still operating)--for the first time I had ever seen my company announced they would no longer give to any charity and several top producers had severe financial losses--one of my office mates had his farm foreclosed on

seriously read the news--in fact today's headline on my morning paper says "foreclosure"

point being there is such thing as an employment slump--I think we have seen the worst pass but even today there are areas of our country where there are five applicants for each job opening

one of my friends moved from Michigan-at that time--he said there were people standing in line for eight dollar an hour jobs--he was a mortgage guy and got out of the business

point being there are many people in our country who have lost their business--and it's not because they are lazy

[bodyhard]

If the thoughts of suicide never crossed someones mind and I am not talking about the pussy ass mother f'kers that cry that sh!t all the time, I am talking about truly contemplating it without telling anyone, then you will never know what the f'ck others are talking about.

I've been through more sh!t in my life than the average person, seen a little girl no more than 7 killed by a single shot to the head by a so called friend right in front of me, because he wanted to see if his gun worked. Seen a man have his arm shot by a shotgun, cut off his dick and stuck it in his mouth, thrown off the roof from the projects and had his face painted green because he was f'cking around with one of our members girlfriend then I myself was stabbed and left for dead because I was a witness and they thought I would rat. I've seen sh!t that had my head all f'cked up and I still dream of some of that sh!t till this day.

But I never attempted to kill myself only after my accident that left me a cripple and I was told I would never walk again. It was then that I put a gun to my mouth and was going to end it all, if it wasn't for my daughter walking in on me I wouldn't be here. I think back at that now and wonder who the f'ck was that guy, what the f'ck was wrong with me? You see, the thing is I don't know that person, because that person definitely was not me, but the mind is so powerful you can not imagine what it can make you do. That same mind that once had me put a gun to my mouth is the same mind that gave me the strength to overcome what every f'cking doctor told me, that I wouldn't walk.

I pray to God everyday and I have faith in him, for those who do not believe in God, more power to you, I respect your belief. But don't f'cking knock me for believing in something that gives me strength to overcome

[beachguy498]

Been hearin' way too much about suicide this year. My wife's boss' brother took his own life earlier in the year, so did someone she worked with. This retired guy around my age who was active in the community shot himself, as did an old friend of mine about a month ago. The last one was terminallly ill.

From what my wife's boss says, the person's focus is totally on themselves and nothing or nobody else matters.

Is this necessarily a boomer thing? I'm not sure. We had a few teens in the community check out early as well this year.

BG

[LisaSkinnoble]

um


I've been wondering for quite some time now, why people type "um"?

"Um" is a filler. Speakers who cannot articulate quickly enough want to fill the dead air with noise and utter "um" or "uh" or "ah". Professional speakers will tell you that a pause of dead air is better than a filler. Someone summed it up as: "Fillers are the bane of any speaker’s existence because they produce a perception of uncertainty."

But a typist has no dead air to fill. So why the filler?

[justboo2u]

I've been wondering for quite some time now, why people type "um"?...

But a typist has no dead air to fill. So why the filler?

Actually you answered your own question with:
... "a perception of uncertainty."

I have done this myself as a way to 'say' I was unsure of the meaning of the response to something I said.... a simpler way of typing

notsureifserious.jpg

I guess.

Tho not the only reason, Im sure, that is mine... :)

[candyismycarb]

I've been wondering for quite some time now, why people type "um"?

"Um" is a filler. Speakers who cannot articulate quickly enough want to fill the dead air with noise and utter "um" or "uh" or "ah". Professional speakers will tell you that a pause of dead air is better than a filler. Someone summed it up as: "Fillers are the bane of any speaker’s existence because they produce a perception of uncertainty."

But a typist has no dead air to fill. So why the filler?

in this case it means
"dude pick up a newspaper -have you the past three years-I can' t beleive I have to spell it out for you"

[-=FLEX=-]

I've been wondering for quite some time now, why people type "um"?

"Um" is a filler. Speakers who cannot articulate quickly enough want to fill the dead air with noise and utter "um" or "uh" or "ah". Professional speakers will tell you that a pause of dead air is better than a filler. Someone summed it up as: "Fillers are the bane of any speaker’s existence because they produce a perception of uncertainty."

But a typist has no dead air to fill. So why the filler?

OK, that was a little bit funny and a whole lot "Yeah really, why do people type the word 'um'"

:D

:)

-=FLEX=-

[KeepItMoving]

Like I wrote, been thru it myself & it sucks big time. Good luck brother.





.

Thanks. And thanks to all for the kind, supportive PM's. Like I said, I am battling right now.

[thor93]

I understand what you are trying to say Charles, but for many it is not simply a choice. I'm one of the lucky ones. I've overcome PTSD, depression and addiction through faith in God and the blessing of the bodybuilding lifestyle. However, my siblings, who suffer some of the same issues, are still 'stuck'. It's not that they wallow in self pity so much (although there is a good bit of that), as they seem to be stuck. I don't know how else to put it.

A good friend of mine who battles his own demons observed that "Action is the enemy of depression." I've never heard it put better. Unfortunately, the opposite is also true. Depression is the enemy of action. The clinically depressed find it very difficult to take action. It's just part of the package. Those that do, often find a way out. Most don't.

I wish there was an easy answer to this, but there isn't. If it were easy, we would all eat right, workout, be centered spiritually, and completely able to stand on our own. A quick look around confirms that humanity is not even close to this.



In on thread.

Good Post.

[Corbi]

OK, that was a little bit funny and a whole lot "Yeah really, why do people type the word 'um'"

:D

:)

-=FLEX=-

Umm, I don't know? :D

[bird72]

If the thoughts of suicide never crossed someones mind and I am not talking about the pussy ass mother f'kers that cry that sh!t all the time, I am talking about truly contemplating it without telling anyone, then you will never know what the f'ck others are talking about.

I've been through more sh!t in my life than the average person, seen a little girl no more than 7 killed by a single shot to the head by a so called friend right in front of me, because he wanted to see if his gun worked. Seen a man have his arm shot by a shotgun, cut off his dick and stuck it in his mouth, thrown off the roof from the projects and had his face painted green because he was f'cking around with one of our members girlfriend then I myself was stabbed and left for dead because I was a witness and they thought I would rat. I've seen sh!t that had my head all f'cked up and I still dream of some of that sh!t till this day.

But I never attempted to kill myself only after my accident that left me a cripple and I was told I would never walk again. It was then that I put a gun to my mouth and was going to end it all, if it wasn't for my daughter walking in on me I wouldn't be here. I think back at that now and wonder who the f'ck was that guy, what the f'ck was wrong with me? You see, the thing is I don't know that person, because that person definitely was not me, but the mind is so powerful you can not imagine what it can make you do. That same mind that once had me put a gun to my mouth is the same mind that gave me the strength to overcome what every f'cking doctor told me, that I wouldn't walk.

I pray to God everyday and I have faith in him, for those who do not believe in God, more power to you, I respect your belief. But don't f'cking knock me for believing in something that gives me strength to overcome

Great post.

And thanks for telling us things that maybe are personal, but they are helpful to those who read it. I did not want to tell the things for which I identify with the person of the article, nor am I going to do, but you have a clear idea of how this works and how you can reach a difficult situation in life. Thanks.

[bird72]

Not a single one of you, regardless of age, has any right to make ASSumptions about my life experience regardless of age, or anyone elses really. My opinion is as valid as anyone's and it's sort of moronic to stereotype me in any way, shape, or form.


The problem is that after you came with this vvvvvv, is clear who the **** come here with a moronic and immature response.



That's your own fault. There is work and money to be made everywhere if you are ambitious enough to find it.