Need help guys, Ive blown it.

[coondog]

I am having to go through a divorce. I didnt want this it was a complete shock, I caught her messing around. It has killed my workouts. I went from 195lbs. to 176lbs. in the last 6 weeks. I am so weak my workouts are nothing, I dont have the energy. I cant sleep or eat. I have lost some serious muscle. I am trying to work through this but with a 8 and 15 year old it is very hard. I hate airing this out here but it is eating me up inside and trying to hold all this inside of me. I feel like I am going to explode. Sorry I just needed alittle relief and to get some of this off my chest before I give myself a heartattack. I just dont know what to do.

[LyingSac]

well working out can be a good place to vent.......I know it isn't your fault but i can image how it feels....I think that's the hard part...getting your trust violated has got to hurt....do what you gotta do and move on the best you can,You know you'll get thru this,just don't let it do too much damage....Sac

[raz1875]

I am having to go through a divorce. I didnt want this it was a complete shock, I caught her messing around. It has killed my workouts. I went from 195lbs. to 176lbs. in the last 6 weeks. I am so weak my workouts are nothing, I dont have the energy. I cant sleep or eat. I have lost some serious muscle. I am trying to work through this but with a 8 and 15 year old it is very hard. I hate airing this out here but it is eating me up inside and trying to hold all this inside of me. I feel like I am going to explode. Sorry I just needed alittle relief and to get some of this off my chest before I give myself a heartattack. I just dont know what to do.

Well I went through a divorce myself. There's no good advice I can
give except that time heals all wounds.

[woodlake]

Just try to take it one day at a time and you will get through this. Good luck and God bless.

[aneas]

Really sorry bro vent away if you feel the need.

[Nainoa]

I am having to go through a divorce. I didnt want this it was a complete shock, I caught her messing around. It has killed my workouts. I went from 195lbs. to 176lbs. in the last 6 weeks. I am so weak my workouts are nothing, I dont have the energy. I cant sleep or eat. I have lost some serious muscle. I am trying to work through this but with a 8 and 15 year old it is very hard. I hate airing this out here but it is eating me up inside and trying to hold all this inside of me. I feel like I am going to explode. Sorry I just needed alittle relief and to get some of this off my chest before I give myself a heartattack. I just dont know what to do.

I keep a thread going in the Misc called "Life Struggles and Support." I can understand not going there to discuss what you're going through...

However... There's a lot of good advice in there... Dare I say given by yours truly starting on Page 5... http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=114239931&page=5

*******

When life gets up on me and it's trying to beat me down...

I keep my Favorite Rocky Balboa Quote in my wallet... And I read/recite it every single day, to remind me to keep fighting.

"Let me tell you something you already know... The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows... It's a very mean and nasty place, and it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it.

You-Me-Nobody can hit as hard as life.

Only it ain't about how hard you hit.
It's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward.
How much you can take and keep moving forward...

That's how winnin' is done!"

-Rocky Balboa.

*********


Now you don't need anyone to tell you that this is going to be a long road back up...

You just took a size 15 steel toed boot right to the old twig and berries.

So it's only natural that you're going to hit the dirt, and curl up in a ball.

My psychic left elbow tells me that you're sick and tired of being curled up in a ball down in the dirt.

So that means you've got to get up and get movin' again.


My suggestion (Beyond the ones in the thread linked above.)

Step 1... Wake up every morning, look yourself dead in the eye in the mirror before you walk out to start your day and say "I am not a victim."

Say it 8 times... Not 7... Not 9...

Every morning... 8 times...


Step 2... Pick something simple that you're good at... Do it.

Step 3... Pick something simple that you've always wanted to do... Do it.

Now I'm not talking something outlandish... I'm not talking about building a time machine out of old bicycle parts... Or buying a sports car and driving around town listening to REO speedwagon blasting on the radio.

I mean "Taking up painting" or Taking up a martial art"


*******

Right now you're like a Dog with a chew toy... You're fixated... and you're pouring all of your energy into the staring at the problems, and all you're doing is feeding your anxiety.

There will come a time when you need to draw up the great sword of your personal passion and go into heated battle with these problems and these issues...

But I think it's important right now for you to rebuild your strength.

And it starts with small successes built up over time, so you can return to being the warrior you feel you are in your heart.

[DaddyR]

Been through it twice myself. Neither one was my idea or fault. One of the best things to help you through the inevitable depresssion is to get out and just be around other people on a regular basis. IMO the gym is a really good place to do that without the burden of feeling like you have to be too sociable.

Hang in there!

[djflex]

good luck ....been there same as many others, the lifts will come back. Do not worry if your lifts are off it happens, but do not give up

[JOHN GARGANI]

I am having to go through a divorce. I didnt want this it was a complete shock, I caught her messing around. It has killed my workouts. I went from 195lbs. to 176lbs. in the last 6 weeks. I am so weak my workouts are nothing, I dont have the energy. I cant sleep or eat. I have lost some serious muscle. I am trying to work through this but with a 8 and 15 year old it is very hard. I hate airing this out here but it is eating me up inside and trying to hold all this inside of me. I feel like I am going to explode. Sorry I just needed alittle relief and to get some of this off my chest before I give myself a heartattack. I just dont know what to do.

classic depression....we could do all the back slapping we want on this thread, but you need professional attention...

GET IT!!!!

[IanR1205]

Cancer survivor here (knock on wood).

It could be worse, OP.

I came out the other end of my ordeal better than when I went in.

If you have any strength you will too.

Just man up and don't start feeling sorry for yourself.

[Old-Time-Lifter]

Do you attend Church? If so, have you talked to your Pastor?

I've been through a divorce, but I was the one who walked out. That still wasn't easy and I can only imagine you're going through alot worse.

Do what you have to do to take care of the kids, they're at an impressionable age (like there is an age that isn't) especially the teenager. If you and you soon to be ex aren't careful you could end up causing the children some life long issues.

Take care and God Bless
Roy

[sybaris]

It could be worse, OP.



The mantra of optimism!


Now get yourself a female lawyer.

[Old-Time-Lifter]

I see that you were having trouble almost exactly a year back, and you mentioned divorce in that thread too. At that time it sounded like you wanted to split but didn't want to leave your daughter behind. Now I'd say you have reason to request custody........

[Nainoa]

Do you attend Church? If so, have you talked to your Pastor?

I've been through a divorce, but I was the one who walked out. That still wasn't easy and I can only imagine you're going through alot worse.

Do what you have to do to take care of the kids, they're at an impressionable age (like there is an age that isn't) especially the teenager. If you and you soon to be ex aren't careful you could end up causing the children some life long issues.

Take care and God Bless
Roy


I don't know about all that when it comes to the children...

I grew up in a home that was broken from the first time I cried on the doctor...

Sure it was a little strange at times...

And there were some twisted challenges...

But they only made me stronger...

What mattered most was that my parents loved me like crazy... And while I disagreed with a lot of what they did and who they were... I never doubted that... And it was the rock that gave me something to always come to ground on.

I mean sure, the details suck rat testicles at times... But in the end, I think if you love anything or anyone enough... It bears out the best in them.

[Nainoa]

Cancer survivor here (knock on wood).

It could be worse, OP.

I came out the other end of my ordeal better than when I went in.

If you have any strength you will too.

Just man up and don't start feeling sorry for yourself.



Very true...

When I look back on the course of my life and all the times I've been beaten down... The times I laid there in the filth of my own self pity or drenched in the gore of my self inflicted stupidity...

All those moments when I shook my fist angry at God, and said "Why me!!!!????"

And I look back at them now with wiser eyes... And I understand how all of those challenges, and fighting my way through them... How they all made sense... they all lead to who and where and what and the understand of why, I am now.

A lot of people say "everything happens for a reason."

I like to say "Everything that comes into your life has purpose."

[jocdat]

Very sorry to hear what you're going through especially getting suckerpunched.

Do what you need to do take care of yourself and your kids. Do not let animosity or vengeance be your sword. Take the high road and be a fine example to your children and the rest will take care of itself.

Good luck and godspeed.

[crupiea]

My wife left me after 25 years and I know just how you feel. There are a few things that are most likely getting you down.

The first is the betrayal that you experienced. There really is no way to resolve it. Time will just have to heal it.

The next is the confidence and blow to your ego. I think this is the hardest to overcome. It feels like you were kicked in the nuts and you can wrack your brain and never figure it out. The reason for this is because there is no answer.

Even if she told you exactly why she did what she did, being a guy, you still wouldnt understand. Its just the way we are wired.

The best remedy is to set your self a set of goals.

Set some for the day, week , month, 6 months and year.
Do something, even the tiniest bit everyday to hit thiee goals. This will give you some direction and it will help you get ouyt of this funk.

I would not reccomend getting another any time soon. This will only comllicate things and drag you down. Get yourself together first and then you will be able to get another woman that is just right for you. Take your time.

You will survive this. Its not all bad, trust me.

I am going to Vegas on Sunday and you know who I asked before booking my hotel? No one.

I threw my dining room table out and replaced it with a pool table. Did I have to get permission? Hell no.

Do you think I have any chick flicks on my Netflix? No.

I also threw out all of the furniture in the family room and made it a gym.

When I think about it, I wish this would have happened 20 years earlier. Someday you will look back on it and think this way too. Until then, set some small goals and do whatever it takes to hit them.

Best of luck.

[immuno]

You will survive this. Its not all bad, trust me.

I am going to Vegas on Sunday and you know who I asked before booking my hotel? No one.

I threw my dining room table out and replaced it with a pool table. Did I have to get permission? Hell no.

Do you think I have any chick flicks on my Netflix? No.

I also threw out all of the furniture in the family room and made it a gym.

When I think about it, I wish this would have happened 20 years earlier. Someday you will look back on it and think this way too. Until then, set some small goals and do whatever it takes to hit them.

Best of luck.

Great post. I've been divorced since last May; I'm now FAR happier than I was when I was in a bad marriage. Over time I think you will start to feel a major sense of relief. Hang in there; it absolutely gets better.

[Griff79]

Hang in there, I have gone through alot over the past year and as time passes life gets better. Bad times don't last for ever.

Griff

[ardsranger]

I went though one to for the same reasons.
Find some help first, depression will mess you up bad.
Get your life in order. Then the desire to do things again will come back.
Prayers with you.

[kimm4]

A good workout can be the best medicine...a good place to take out all your frustrations and stress. I know it's easier said than done...but you've got to pick yourself and take it one day at a time.

The most important factor right now should be your children. You as their father need to be there for them...because I'm sure this is affecting them as well.

Best of luck...things will turn out fine.

[Xyphis]

Just some practical advice:

Be careful what you say/post/opine on an open forum when you are going through legal divorce proceedings.

I hope all turns out for you as best as it can. Divorce is certainly one of the most emotionally disruptive events that can happen in ones life.

[Mixelflick]

I am having to go through a divorce. I didnt want this it was a complete shock, I caught her messing around. It has killed my workouts. I went from 195lbs. to 176lbs. in the last 6 weeks. I am so weak my workouts are nothing, I dont have the energy. I cant sleep or eat. I have lost some serious muscle. I am trying to work through this but with a 8 and 15 year old it is very hard. I hate airing this out here but it is eating me up inside and trying to hold all this inside of me. I feel like I am going to explode. Sorry I just needed alittle relief and to get some of this off my chest before I give myself a heartattack. I just dont know what to do.

Hold your head high. You held up your end of the bargain, and kept your word. You will die with a clear conscience. She won't...

[JonnyStead]

My wife left me after 25 years and I know just how you feel. There are a few things that are most likely getting you down.

The first is the betrayal that you experienced. There really is no way to resolve it. Time will just have to heal it.

The next is the confidence and blow to your ego. I think this is the hardest to overcome. It feels like you were kicked in the nuts and you can wrack your brain and never figure it out. The reason for this is because there is no answer.

Even if she told you exactly why she did what she did, being a guy, you still wouldnt understand. Its just the way we are wired.

The best remedy is to set your self a set of goals.

Set some for the day, week , month, 6 months and year.
Do something, even the tiniest bit everyday to hit thiee goals. This will give you some direction and it will help you get ouyt of this funk.

I would not reccomend getting another any time soon. This will only comllicate things and drag you down. Get yourself together first and then you will be able to get another woman that is just right for you. Take your time.

You will survive this. Its not all bad, trust me.

I am going to Vegas on Sunday and you know who I asked before booking my hotel? No one.

I threw my dining room table out and replaced it with a pool table. Did I have to get permission? Hell no.

Do you think I have any chick flicks on my Netflix? No.

I also threw out all of the furniture in the family room and made it a gym.

When I think about it, I wish this would have happened 20 years earlier. Someday you will look back on it and think this way too. Until then, set some small goals and do whatever it takes to hit them.

Best of luck.

THis is the post of the day in my view. Life experience speaks volumes.

Stick it out OP - my mantra in life is "Does this work for ME?" in other words, is what I'm going through, being asked to do, worrying about etc in my interest? if not - screw it - I dont do unless I want to. It sounds selfish, but you have to keep yourself as your top priority. Be good to yourself and it'll all come right.

Rocky had some good words too - in the posts above :)

Good luck and remember in 5 years time, you'll wonder what you were so cut about.

[Taichichuan]

I am having to go through a divorce. I didnt want this it was a complete shock, I caught her messing around. It has killed my workouts. I went from 195lbs. to 176lbs. in the last 6 weeks. I am so weak my workouts are nothing, I dont have the energy. I cant sleep or eat. I have lost some serious muscle. I am trying to work through this but with a 8 and 15 year old it is very hard. I hate airing this out here but it is eating me up inside and trying to hold all this inside of me. I feel like I am going to explode. Sorry I just needed alittle relief and to get some of this off my chest before I give myself a heartattack. I just dont know what to do.

Get rid of the "whore wife" and get your life back on track! Jesus! My wife getting fyucked by another man drove me crazy as hell! I told her, "Get the fyuck out of my house and take the two boys with you!" The boys disrespect her for breaking up the family. They are scarred for life because of her!

Get a woman in your life that will appreciate you!

[oldmangreene]

I can understand the pain and hurt, but over time it will go away and your going to be better off...No need to stay in a marriage as you described....Just remember the most important thing here is the kids...They are "Unconditional" love...Focus your attention on their well being and one day when the hurt is gone you will stand tall because you took care of what is really important...Try to be honest to yourself, you have to think positive and face each day...Regardless of your divorce your kids will always love you if you focus on what's best for them...Time is a great healer in life...You will be ok

[sybaris]

Hold your head high. You held up your end of the bargain, and kept your word. You will die with a clear conscience. She won't...

This is what I love about online forums. The OP's are ALWAYS Saints.

[aneas]

This is what I love about online forums. The OP's are ALWAYS Saints.

I dont kick a person when they are down.

[gkrane]

I can only imagine the pain you must be feeling. Time will heal everything. Focus on doing things that YOU want to do. Look at the bright side....Now you can go find a woman with a body like Kimm4's.

[Old-Time-Lifter]

Get rid of the "whore wife" and get your life back on track! Jesus! My wife getting fyucked by another man drove me crazy as hell! I told her, "Get the fyuck out of my house and take the two boys with you!" The boys disrespect her for breaking up the family. They are scarred for life because of her!

Get a woman in your life that will appreciate you!

I'm sure your tossing them out with their mother had no negative emotional effect on them!! Good Grief man, that's damn COLD!!

No matter how pi$$ed you are with the mother it is NO REASON to take it out on the kids even if they are step children!! (which is not indicated here)

[LyingSac]

I'm sure your tossing them out with their mother had no negative emotional effect on them!! Good Grief man, that's damn COLD!!

No matter how pi$$ed you are with the mother it is NO REASON to take it out on the kids even if they are step children!! (which is not indicated here)

it's just sex,get over it....Old Timer is right....the kids should allways ,in every decision come first....

[pmartel]

well working out can be a good place to vent.......I know it isn't your fault but i can image how it feels....I think that's the hard part...getting your trust violated has got to hurt....do what you gotta do and move on the best you can,You know you'll get thru this,just don't let it do too much damage....Sac


The workout DOES help you cope with so much. I too know what it's like to have your trust violated and as Sac says TRY to move on. You just may not know what's around the corner, sappy as it seems.

Me being in a high stress job, I'm discovering how much working out helps me cope and focus on OTHER things.

Good luck and try not to stress, NOT worth a heart attack.

[DarkmanP]

not to preach religion man or anything but I hope you believe. go and drop down to one need and talk to whom it is you believe in that will help guide your decisions moving forward in this emotional mess for everyone. And now you got time to hit the gym good may be twice in one day. since your losing a little bit of size and strength go light for the first week and focus on form. the next week on the same muscle group go balls out to failure. the next week go heavy. give your mind other things to focus on by setting up new goals.

the workouts will help you release the emotional energy building up. good luck!

[jocdat]

Get rid of the "whore wife" and get your life back on track! Jesus! My wife getting fyucked by another man drove me crazy as hell! I told her, "Get the fyuck out of my house and take the two boys with you!" The boys disrespect her for breaking up the family. They are scarred for life because of her!


I'm sure your tossing them out with their mother had no negative emotional effect on them!! Good Grief man, that's damn COLD!!

No matter how pi$$ed you are with the mother it is NO REASON to take it out on the kids even if they are step children!! (which is not indicated here)

I SO agree with Old-Time-Lifter. ^^^^^^^^^^

Taichichuan, those children had NOTHING to do with the breakup of your marriage. Why on EARTH would you do that to those children?! If you found out that they are not your biological children, I can understand your anger and betrayal but the children had nothing to do with it. Your ex-wife did.

Those children should never have felt victimized by you or your ex-wife but it's too late now. They ARE scarred because of you both, not just her.

If you honestly cared about those children, I'd suggest you to apologize to them for your insensitivity and callousness. If you choose not to, then I believe you tried to paint yourself as a saint in a rather atrocious post and that there's plenty more to the story with you being the focal point, buddy.

Sorry for my nervy post but what you have done is just BEYOND COLD.

And for the record, don't go putting ugly thoughts in the OP's head by calling his ex-wife "a whore". It's HIS wife, not yours so butt out with the name calling. Better yet, just don't say anything "supportive". Sometimes being silent is supportive enough.

G'day.

[Harley05bill]

As you can see you are not alone in this area we all have had a few short falls. I went the oposite way and gained weight I sat around feeling sorry for myself eat, drank alot and ended up weighing in at 307 lbs before I finally had enough took almost 4 years to get to that point I do not suggest waiting that long it will be like hell for me to lose the weight that I gained from it. Now I am much better off without the hassle, down to 384 lbs when I started reading the forums and taking the advise of the forum members. take your time but dont wait to long read these forums to keep motivated. good luck to you everyone here is pullin for ya not like some other forums who will only tell ya to man up and quit being a wus. We all are grown ups and have lived real lives so don't be ashamed if you must vent here.

[Mixelflick]

This is what I love about online forums. The OP's are ALWAYS Saints.

I'm giving the benefit of the doubt, OK? Why are you going the other way with it?

You may not have fallen on hard times yourself, but if you do I hope someone does the same for you.

[RonGoon]

I'm sure your tossing them out with their mother had no negative emotional effect on them!! Good Grief man, that's damn COLD!!

No matter how pi$$ed you are with the mother it is NO REASON to take it out on the kids even if they are step children!! (which is not indicated here)

thought that was pretty damn effed up myself...was hoping i misunderstood.

[Minotaur]

classic depression....we could do all the back slapping we want on this thread, but you need professional attention...

GET IT!!!!

Yes, some things you can't go through alone. I know.

[Minotaur]

This is what I love about online forums. The OP's are ALWAYS Saints.

That's a pretty ****ed up view of it, and completely uncalled for.

[Minotaur]

I dont kick a person when they are down.

He/she got negged for being a douchebag unnecessarily.

[paolo59]

I am truly sorry for your present circumstance. If I could give any advice it would be that you talk to someone about what's going on inside, and not just let it simmer. "Get some counseling," is often what one really doesn't want to hear, but a good ear, and wisdom offered from another can be a lifesaver when the chips are down. I trust that you can work through this hurtful situation as quickly as possible. You must do all that you can to take care of yourself physically. Emotional problems can rip you apart, but they are only amplified if you let the "physical" slide. You need to stay healthy!

[DaddyR]

... Do not let animosity or vengeance be your sword. Take the high road and be a fine example to your children and the rest will take care of itself...

Quoted for emphasis. I couldn't agree more. It's going to be VERY hard to do so, but when it comes to negotiating with the ex, the best thing you can do for yourself and the kids is to keep your cool and be as reasonable and calm as possible. I have been unusually blessed to have been through two very peaceful and sane divorces. I know a lot of guys who have been through hell on earth with their exes. I hope and pray you are able to keep things civil.

Keep in mind every time you swallow your pride and answer calmly and rationally that you're doing it for yourself and the kids, not because you give a rats azz about the ex.

[moisy]

I am sorry too about what you are going through. I am presently going thru the same thing and for the same reason - I asked him to leave several months ago based on his behviour - and am so happy and at peace right now. However I do not have children nor did I invest the time that you did into your marriage - mine was very short lived thankfully.

I think it is important to remember that everything happens for a reason whether it is good or bad - you are not meant to be in this situation. And rather than looking at this as a negative thing, look at it as an opportunity to start a fresh new beginning for yourself ... and to take the high road as one other poster mentioned to set a good example for your children. They will remember how you behaved at this crucial time in their loves. Continue to love them, talk to them, listen to them and support them ... and more importantly love yourself - you did nothing wrong - you can only be responsible for your actions and not the actions of others ;)

I wish you all the best ... and get in the gym to push some weights - you would be surprised how therapeutic it can be :)

[Taichichuan]

Gggggrrrrrrrr!!!

[coondog]

Thanks for all the support guys and girls. I am picking myself up its just been alittle slow. I guess I was just floored because I had become a great dad and husband I thought. I quit drinking and acting crazy when I got married and had a kid, my other is my step-daugther but she is basically mine, her dad has had some problems and I raised her since she was 5 years old and we are close. The girls mean everything to me and are my main concern. I hired a really good lawyer, a women and I am the one who filed for divorce so we will see what comes out of it. Thanks again for the support. I will let you all know what happens when its over with. thanks coondog

[eomrat]

As for me, the net result of my divorce was that it freed me up to meet and marry a damn good woman. It hurt when it happened but was far and away the best thing that ever happened to me.

[Uber_Dad]

classic depression....we could do all the back slapping we want on this thread, but you need professional attention...

GET IT!!!!

this ^ go see you're regular dr. and ask him about a therapist, I think it should be mandatory for anybody getting a divorce.

Oh yeah, spend time looking for a good lawyer as well.

[JolietKev]

I agree with may on this board who have children. They are the victims in the cases of diviorce. No matter what the situation (unless multiple murders, rape or incest is involved), you should never talk bad about your ex in front of the children. Remember that kids look up to their parents no matter what happens and you should not make them suffer for your mistakes. I believe that in every relationship both sides have to take accountability for the end of a relationship. It is only by the grace of God that my wife an I are still together. The Good Lord knows that there have been days...... . I wish you the bestin the future an I hope that your future decisions begin and end with the emotional well being of your children.

[JohnTheBlaze]

Look man..there are a lot of good pieces of advice here...you can pick and choose what parts you would like to use...but the truth be told...TIME is the big factor here. You had time and energy invested in this relationship...you had kids...you had a family...these are things that can't be taken lightly of course...but you need to do what ever you can to pull yourself up...if you don't want to work out...don't...but you have to do something. Try yard work...or going to a walk...do something with your kids. Do you have a dog? Do you like dogs? Do you have time in your life to take care of a dog? I tell you the truth...getting a dog was the best thing I have ever done. My GF of 3 years broke up with me and then I got a dog...I didn't have time to think about how miserable I was...i had a dog that needed a walk...or needed to get fed or go to the vet. Now I take walks with him 2 times a day...his care is more important then the dishes in my sink or the taking out garbage...eventually I was able to incorporate him into my life and get everything back on track. Now I work out 3 days a week and take the dog for a walk almost every day. The thing about dogs is that they very rarely ever NOT make someone smile or laugh...plus they love you unconditional and they will never leave you. I realize that a dog isn't for everyone but its just an example. Whatever you decide man...take your time...get it back together...and start working out again...its for your health!

Take care man! Take care!

[Analyst]

Agree with the suggestions that say working out can help you get back on track. To those I'd add that, if you've lost 20 pounds in six weeks, you're pretty much not eating, period. You have to start eating; that's dangerous weight loss.

[Capt_Lou]

Day after I moved out was the first day in the gym. It was the best move that I ever made. Kept me busy and my mind clear and gave me goals other than boozing it up.

Plus I look 10 times better than she does right now ;)

Get your a$$ back in the gym and hit it hard. find yourself a hot little woman to put on your arm and show how you still got it :)

[blkbelt42]

Haven't talked to you but I'm sorry to
hear about it.

I can tell you to give a look at what Nainoa
has written, the guy has a way with words like few
I've seen here...serious.

[dmtc73]

I had a really "easy" divorce compared to others, not through my choice, but it still was horrific. I never really understood what other friends and family went through until it happened to me...

Just take it a day at a time, and eventually it will come back together...

I lost a lot of weight as well in the first few weeks, through forgetting to eat, stress (sending my metabolism crazy) and generally no sleep.

Take it easy. At the time, I found running and swimming helped.

Also, it is a good idea to write things down that you might need for your divorce while everything is fresh... (what you want to give/get out of this etc (money, items, access to children etc, and the "proof" of what happened should you need it in court).

Hope it goes well. It really will be a lot easier if you can get through it while remaining on good terms....